we're all mad here!

a quiet peacefullness

This fall our home underwent a big change. Our crazy, loud, family filled evenings suddenly became quiet and (dare I say it?)... peaceful. Our littlest giant started college, and both kids fell into two seperate jobs working at the same place. All fall they worked Friday and Saturday nights at Shaw Haven, a local haunted house/ cornmaze / haunted hayride. We went from a house full of teenagers to a house full of just the two of us. Talk about wonderful! 

As the kids began to leave the tailend of their teenager years behind, I had worried that I might start to become anxious about what they were out and about up to. Not because I don't trust them or anything, we've raised two amazing young adults and I know they have a strong foundation to stear them through life's wavy waters. It was more of a [I've spent practically every moment of their life with them, and now I'm not] kinda feeling. Totally normal for a mom in my position. BUT so far it hasn't felt that way - imagine my surprise! It's been really REALLY nice.

Big Daddy and I dated for four years before we got married, and both loving children jumped headfirst into the parent pont with nary a look back over our shoulders. Probably not one of our wiser most thought-out moments, but we wouldn't change a minute of it because it's ALL made us who we are this very minute. It kinda feels like dating all over again. Suddenly we can have a whole conversation without interjected comments from the peanut gallery. Things have become quiet and peaceful. We still have nights where there is a houseful of teenagers {last night I made spagetti so we had extra babybirds to feed}, but more often than not the evenings are simple.

The timing couldn't be more perfect. Fall is slipping into winter, and things tend to naturally hunker down around that time here anyway. This winter twilight there just happens to be two of us doing most of the hibernating, and it feels really nice. 

NOW GO MAKE ART!

Artistic Advice - question1/post 4

I'm rounding out my first segment of Artistic Answers with Cynthia Shaffer. Someone I met through one of my most important mentors (and editors), Jenny Doh. Cynthia and I have discovered that we're both Japanophiles who love to do a lot of the same types of arts & crafts. She's the sensible to Jenny's silly, and someone I've come to admire VERY much (wink!). Hop back over here on Monday to hear my final thoughts on deadlines during chaos. Thank you to all the amazing artists for their time, candor, and advice - I couldn't do it without any of you!

Cynthia Shaffer
+photographer - expert seamstress - painter+ 

It's super important to set deadlines way ahead of any editors or publishers calendar. I usually pace myself and try to create at least 3 pieces a week for a book that might contain 30+ projects. Many times I can get 4 projects done and so if that family issue comes up, I can take a week or so off cause I'm usually ahead of the plan. 

Communication is key. Let editors know where you're at with projects and articles. Let them know what's happening at home, chances are they will understand and extend the deadline.

I do work from my home studio and have kids and their friends running around the house all the time which is truely a blessing. I can stop what I'm working on and just hang out with them or jump in the car and go to the beach for a few hours, knowing that I will be working late into the night. 

Also, having a good working/friendly relationship with editors is so important. There are a couple of editors that I work with that I have really gotten to know quite well, and we often email back and forth about what's going on in our lives, while also talking about work related stuff ... You know, building relationships and friendships is so important.

• https://www.facebook.com/cynthia.t.shaffer
• http://www.cynthiashaffer.typepad.com

Cynthia also recently blogged on just getting started - a concept I love: http://cynthiashaffer.typepad.com/blog/2012/07/free-motion-stitching-continued.html

NOW GO MAKE ART!

If you missed any of the 3 previous posts you can find them here:

• question 1/post 1
• question 1/ post 2
• question 1/ post 3

Artistic Answers - question 1/post 3

Happy Thursday my peeps! Here is post 3 from my first segment of Artistic Answers series. I take a break from online posting / deadlines every Wednesday, one of the ways I give myself more time to work on writing/art deadlines during the week so it doesn't take away from MY family time. If you missed posts 1 and 2 you can scroll down to the bottom of this post for the links. Again, if you love these women and what they have to share with you, I hope you'll hop over to their blogs to get to know them better.

SUNNY CARVALhO
+sculptor - painter+

I think it is very important to meet deadlines (even self-imposed ones)...BUT my family is more important than anything else. Every summer, I get slapped back into the reality of family as my kids find daily reasons to pull me away from my job! I am so blessed to be able to set my own schedule and do what I love for a living. In the summer (and any other time I am needed) though...my first job is to be a mother and wife. Sometimes I have to tell people "I can only do 'that thing' if I can do it on my schedule"...or "sorry, but I am going to take a little longer than I thought". BUT....I always meet my commitments though, even if I am slower than I meant to be.

• https://www.facebook.com/sunny.carvalho.5
• http://www.sunnycarvalho.blogspot.com

LINDA WOODS
+author - painter - my Miss Sassypants hero+

It's been my experience that life is just a series of things cropping up. When you work from home or for yourself, time management is key. Part of my time management plan is not always saying yes and becoming skilled at setting my alarm clock. I'm often up working on projects while everyone else is asleep. I think being reliable matters so even when unexpected things come up at home (and they often do), I just keep Starbucks in business, take a deep breath, and power through it. It's like college all over again!

• https://www.facebook.com/lindawoodsart
• http://iamartblog.com

 
JEANNE OLIVER
+designer - artist +

I feel like deadlines make me focus in many areas of my life. We work hard and we play hard. When it is time to work and meet a deadline my whole family pitches in. If something unexpected comes up with family or something personal I guess my answer would differ based upon what it is. If someone was hurt or needed me immediately I would put work aside and be with them. If it isn't anything too bad I feel like my work is therapeutic and would actually help me deal with it. I love what I do and the quietness of creating in any form gives me the time to think through what is going on and usually gives me a better perspective.

• https://www.facebook.com/jeanne.griffinoliver
• http://jeanneoliverdesigns.com/blog

NOW GO MAKE ART!

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friends - how many of us have them

Let me start off with a disclaimer that this is one of those early morning, reflective, kinda deepish posts about life that only has a smidge to do with art. If you're not interested in those kinds of posts from me, I suggest you move along and come back tomorrow when I'm sure to be back to art, art, and more art.

The last couple years for me has been all about friendships. Finding and making new ones, doing the work to rekindle longtime ones, and discovering which ones I'm better off without. Friends have always been a sticky thing for me. I grew up in a neighborhood full of girls; my street alone had 15 within a 5 year age gap. The good of this was that there was always someone to hang out with, the bad was that there always seemed to be an odd number which results in odd-man-out, the ugly was that girls have a tendency to be really nasty to each other given the right circumstances. That meant there was always plenty of nasty to go around.

Those of you who really know me, know that I have a VERY soft heart. I am always overflowing with love, but I also overthink everything and get hurt very easily by the silliest of wayward words and actions. This was magnified 100 times when I was a teenager, and more than once I've cleaned my friend house completely out to keep the softest parts of my heart from being mashed to death by the stampede of mean girls. This has resulted in times throughout my life where I had virtually no girlfriends to chat with, hang out, or rely on to get me through the rough patches. My virtual porch was feeling kinda empty. So, when I got to about my mid-30's I decided I wanted to change that aspect of my life, and set out on a mission to find and embrace new friends.

To say that it's been a bit of a bumpy road would be an understatement. When you've gone through life with bad friend experiences, one of the things you have to take a look at is the fact that your picker is probally WAY off. This doesn't just go away because you want it to. You have to do a bit more bad picking before you wake up and realize you're doing something wrong. One of the things I think a lot of us are guilty of {myself in particular}, is what comedian Kevin Hart calls "changing lanes"; trying to form friendships outside of our lifestyle. I have a tendancy of looking for friends that I don't have a lot in common with so that we have lots to talk about. I've done this since High School with very mixed results. I've always seen it as something positive, but I'm really starting to question if those friendships really work over the long haul. At 41, I've finally come to the conclusion that this doesn't always work, and more often than not, leaves me feeling perplexed and unfulfilled as the other person in the friendship pulls away the more they discover we don't share common thoughts, ideologies, or ways of looking at the world.

Another thing I've been guilty of in the past is letting older friendships slide or glide along on their own steam. Over the past six months I have put a lot of time and energy into rekindling, and maintaining those important friendships. I think in my push for new friends and experiences, I overlooked the importance of the people I already had in my life and genuinely love. Not one of my proudest moments. But, rather than shrug and continue moving along at that frantic new friend pace, I've slowed down and apologized. I've started to tell these wonderful girls in my life just how much they really mean to me, and how much I want to continue to grow our relationship. I've regrouped and refocused rather than rolling around in the guilt of it all. I've learned to take a closer look at the art girls "in my lane", and have started to see what shining stars they are in my life. I'm taking baby steps to bring them deeper into my heart ... daring to trust that they aren't going to stomp all over my soft spots, and taking time to really SEE who they are and what it is I love about them.

Does that mean that I'm done looking for new friendships? Nope, in fact Larry and I had dinner with a newish friend and her family last night, and we both left feeling really happy we had driven the hour to meet them. It just means that I'm taking a much deeper look inside them before I start investing all that time and energy. It means that I recognize the commitment of making and keeping the people who matter the most to me in life. It means that I'm going to continue to give all that love away regardless of what I get back in return ... but be a bit pickier about how much I give the ones who don't return it. If there's someone in your life who really matters to your heart ... regardless of how long you've known them ... please take a moment today and tell them exactly why they hold a place in your heart.

A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often - just to save it from drying out completely.
+Pam Brown+

NOW GO MAKE ART!

getting back on the horse

Hello 2012!
Today is the Chinese New Year - Year of the Dragon, and I've been starting out the new year finally working on a new blog post. It's a quiet Monday night, with Larry at Pool, and Jules volunteering at the Concessions for Buddy Basketball. I've been itching to get back to blogging, but REALLY having a hard time getting started. I wonder if part of it is because I fear it will be the end of this wonderful hibernation I've been wallowing in? I've loved the quiet, the time to journal and think, being home and not so much online ... but I feel it's time to poke my nose out of my cave and get back to doing what I love to do. Now, there's part of the problem too ... ever since finishing up my book { Mixed and Stitched } I've had a hard time pinpointing exactly what it is I want to do next.

Every year when my birthday rolls around, I find myself getting really introspective about where I've been and where I'd like to go. Part of this process is taking a break from the online world to focus more of my time and energy towards my family and home during the holidays. The hard part comes when it's time to get back to being online, and blogging more consistently. There is something about taking that break that really makes you want to stay in that offline place.

I spend a lot of that time journaling about what it is I love to do now, because as we evolve as artists, so too does our interests and dreams. What happens when we achieve our dreams? How do we decide on new ones and what's next?

After you've put in all that hard work - how do you re-ignite that fire and passion for something new? This is uncharted teritory for me ... and I find myself wandering around restless in search of that new thing that will having me charing off to conquer it. Are you diggin' me?

I'm slowly starting to see a glimmer of what's next with the help of those I love and the advice of fellow artists I admire. I think that's a whole nother post tho, so I'm going to skip back a bit and tell you about my winter adventures while I was away.

One of the silliest and most awesome things I did this winter was learn how to make my own pickles! You can find the recipe I used here:

MIXED PICKLED VEGIES

I used apple cider vinegar & a little less kosher salt than called for - left out the cinnamon stick - Holly & I pickled asperagus / green beans / cucumbers and they were SO EASY and completely AMAZING! Everyone loved them, and I'm not kidding you when I say it took all of about 1/2 hour including cutting up all the veggies. If you are a lover of pickles, I HIGHLY recommend this recipe! 

I bought a packet for Bread & Butter pickles [per Jake's request], and I'm going to make a few jars that are just green beans { my absolute fav! }. I'm curious if you tried anything new over the holidays, and if so, did you blog about it? Please leave your link in the comments section so we can all take a peek!

And now I think I've rambled on enough ... not too shabby for a month sabatical from blogging. Tomorrow, I'll write a little bit about my Christmas vacation in Las Vegas, and my word & quote for the New Year.

NOW GO MAKE ART!

snuggled in for the holidays

December is one of my favorite months for a multitude of reasons - the best being my birthday is the 7th and I love my birthday. I love birthdays in general and go out of my way to make them special, but I love having that one special day out of the year that is all about me. {important when you are a pleaser} Second would be my kids are off school for a couple weeks, and we all have a good time hanging out together. On the tail of that is getting to spend time with my family. Whether my sister's family comes here to us or we go out to her, it's always been a time when my family comes together to catch up and celebrate. Last, but certainly not least is the start of a new year - both for me age wise and on the calendar.

Everything I write comes from my childhood in one way or another. I am forever drawing on the sense of mystery and wonder and possibility that pervaded that time of my life.
+ Kate DiCamillo +

I also do a lot of drawing in the winter, and it's made me so happy to see my drawing skills improve this past year. I put my mind to making sure I was drawing at least a couple times a week, and I can definitely tell a difference. I found this incredible children's book, The Poppyseed Cakes, when I was in Camas last month, and it became the perfect inspiration last week when I was trying to find something different to do. I'm on drawing number 5 of a five day run, and intend to continue on until the pages are all gone. I open the book to a random page, and read the text. I use the text as a prompt for the drawing, and hop off to the internet to find a quote that matches my drawing. My goal is to continue improving my drawing skills while producing something fun for my etsy shop.

It is only by drawing often, drawing everything, drawing incessantly, that one fine day you discover to your surprise that you have rendered something in its true character.
+ Camille Pissarro +

So anyways, on to the meat of this post - my thoughts on creating perfect holidays. Now, generally I go all out for the holidays; figurines / ornaments / candles / wall hanging / flowers / lights ... you get my point. Well, this year we decided to simplify things A LOT, and our mantra this season is:

DON'T WORRY IF IT'S NOT PERFECT - JUST ENJOY IT WITH ALL YOUR HEART

You see, last year I ran around like a crazy woman making everything as perfect as possible, and then Larry lost both his sister and father on either side of Christmas, along with a whole lot of other chaotic events, and things got totally skewed and out of hand despite my best efforts. The result is that I didn't really enjoy the holidays much last year which is VERY unusual for me. I LOVE the holidays, and all the cooking and decorating that goes along with celebrating them, so this was a huge knock down last year. This year, I started feeling those panicy "things aren't going to be just right"  jitters right before Halloween, and it threatened to send me spinning out of control. Larry, in response dug in, and declared that he wasn't participating in any of the madness this year ... period ... end of discussion. Well, in true Jennifer form, I dug right in myself and started up with the badgering and protests of why my way is better. Did I get anywhere? What do you think :)

No one is perfect... that's why pencils have erasers. 
+ Author Unknown +

 This is the look I get when I'm trying to do something we both know is ridiculous and unrealistic: 

After about 15 minutes of pouting and stomping my feet, I mulled over his very good points, and decided that I wasn't going to participate in the craziness this year either. You see, we leave for Vegas on the 23rd so the Christmas tree has to be down & out so we're still not trying to get needles out of the carpet in July.  We went and got a little tree that is shorting than me, and it only has my snowflake lights on it ... no ornaments this year - but it's all good :) There's also not craziness to drag out or put away as we try to get out of town to be with our family. This has left me so much more time to make gifts, and draw, and read, and do the things I love - starting to get the bigger picture? 

So, I'll leave you with thoughts on simplifying, and taking things down to the bare bones of what you really enjoy this holiday season, as I'm off to sew and stitch up wonderful things in my studio.

NOW GO MAKE ART!